{"id":67,"date":"2015-04-29T21:48:32","date_gmt":"2015-04-29T11:48:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/parentequip.info\/?page_id=67"},"modified":"2015-04-30T10:31:45","modified_gmt":"2015-04-30T00:31:45","slug":"your-home-environment","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/?page_id=67","title":{"rendered":"Your Home Environment"},"content":{"rendered":"<h1><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><b>Creating a Home Environment that will grow Sexually Healthy Kids<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n<p>Info based on content from the <b>BOOK: <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><span style=\"color: blue; text-decoration: underline;\">A Chicken&#8217;s Guide to Talking Turkey with your Kids about Sex<\/span><\/span><\/b>(Leman\/Bell Ch 3<b>)<\/b><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\">\u00a0<b>Sex ed begins on the change table<\/b><\/span>; thru all the things you&#8217;ve said about bodily functions (runny noses, bowel movements, passing gas your own period) you&#8217;ve been teaching them how to think about their bodies. They&#8217;ve been watching u very closely; they&#8217;ve been studying u!<\/li>\n<li><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>Dads<\/b><\/span> instruct their kids in sex ed by how they treat their wives, &amp; how they view women<\/li>\n<li><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>Mums<\/b><\/span> communicate volumes by how whey treat their husband<\/li>\n<li>consider areas in your home where <b>unhealthy patterns of relating<\/b> take place. Consider these areas in view of how important<span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b> teaching by example<\/b><\/span> is to your kids.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h1><span style=\"color: #008000;\">\u00a0<b>MAKING TIME FOR YOUR MASTERPIECE<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n<p>Trust &amp; bonding take time. Disciplines we can apply ourselves, as parents:-<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 20px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 1.2;\">\u00a0<\/span><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><b style=\"font-size: 20px; line-height: 1.2;\">Don&#8217;t pack your calendar<\/b><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">G<\/span>et rid of anything that takes you away from time you need to be with your family. The years of puberty are critical; once your kids reach a certain age, you&#8217;re done. <span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>Don&#8217;t retreat too early, while they still need you<\/b><\/span>. (PUBERTY-8-14 y.o.)<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>Family intimacy gets built around non-essential time<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 20px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 1.2;\">\u00a0<\/span><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><b style=\"font-size: 20px; line-height: 1.2;\">Open or closed?<\/b><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>Foster transparency<\/b><\/span>. Pay attention to your child&#8217;s issues &amp; model behaviour thru your own life.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><span style=\"font-size: 20px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 1.2;\">\u00a0<\/span><b style=\"font-size: 20px; line-height: 1.2;\">Taking your kids on dates<\/b><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">When you make your kids the centre of attention for a set period, it sends their esteem thru the roof. One on one time <span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>gives kids permission<\/b><\/span> to voice their honest reactions in a relaxed environment. It also <b>empowers the parent <\/b>to comment on issues so they can be worked thru together.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 20px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 1.2;\">\u00a0<\/span><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><b style=\"font-size: 20px; line-height: 1.2;\">Take advantage of precious evenings &amp; mornings<\/b><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">The best time to parent is often in the evening an hour before sleep time, when kids are most receptive &amp; unguarded. Consider giving each child <span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>half an hour<\/b><\/span> of your time!?!?<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 20px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 1.2;\">\u00a0<\/span><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><b style=\"font-size: 20px; line-height: 1.2;\">Simplify<\/b><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Activities are not always intrinsically good; beware of using your child&#8217;s activities to define <b>your own identity<\/b>. <span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>Overdosing on activities can dilute the parent-child bond<\/b><\/span>; doing too much can shift the focus of the family to the kids, rather than from the more healthy perspective, being a focus on the parents. A recommendation is <b>one activity per child, per Term<\/b><i>.<\/i>(some families do 1 sport, 1 music per Term)<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"color: #000000;\">Consider slowing down enough to<span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b> listen to your kid&#8217;s hearts<\/b><\/span>, not their words.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 20px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 1.2;\">\u00a0<\/span><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><b style=\"font-size: 20px; line-height: 1.2;\">Listen to their hearts, not just their words<\/b><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><b>no matter what kids say, they really do want you to stay involved in their lives<\/b>, in appropriate ways that don&#8217;t embarrasss them. They desire your approval &amp; affirmation.<span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b> They want your attention &amp; guidance<\/b>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>As their parent, you ultimately know what&#8217;s best for them<\/b><\/span>. You need to admit, <i>&#8216;Hey, I am the parent here. I am going to come alongside my son or daughter. I am not going to run her over, but I&#8217;m going to be involved in her life&#8217;.<\/i><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #008000;\"><span style=\"font-size: 20px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 1.2;\">\u00a0<\/span><b style=\"font-size: 20px; line-height: 1.2;\">Sons need mums, Daughters need dads; the importance of cross-gender connection<\/b><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">It is common to act opposite to this, but it is recommended that <span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>dads<\/b><\/span> talk to their girls about how men view women, in both positive &amp; negative ways (honestly!), and <span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>mums<\/b><\/span>, talk about how women view men, &amp; how women want to be treated.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\">\u00a0During early puberty (8-14), when dads affirm their girls, they are really <span style=\"color: #ff0000;\"><b>affirming their femininity<\/b><\/span>. It&#8217;s better they get the attention they require from dad, than from other boys\/men! See the resource section for <strong><span style=\"color: #c00000;\">a must read for dads<\/span><\/strong> titled <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><span style=\"color: #0000ff; text-decoration: underline;\">What a Daughter Needs from Her Dad: How a man prepares his daughter for life<\/span><\/span>. (Michael Farris). Consider encouraging dad to take his daughter\/s out on dates regularly. Starting from as young as 3-4 years old is beneficial &amp; the best case scenario. Dads will see their daughter\/s come alive &amp; blossom naturally in their tender love &amp; care, &amp; with their undivided attention, no matter how small the dose. An ice-cream outing can be considered a date. A trip to the local store, &#8216;just dad &amp; his girl&#8217;, can be considered a date. It doesn&#8217;t have to cost much or involve a lot of time. Setting the stage for your daughter to open her heart to her dad during the often turbulent teen years ahead is the purpose of establishing regular one on one time. Better to be dad than a random boy!!!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Creating a Home Environment that will grow Sexually Healthy Kids Info based on content from the BOOK: A Chicken&#8217;s Guide to Talking Turkey with your Kids about Sex(Leman\/Bell Ch 3) \u00a0Sex ed begins on the change table; thru all the things you&#8217;ve said about bodily functions (runny noses, bowel movements, passing gas your own period) &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/?page_id=67\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Your Home Environment<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"parent":12,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/67"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=67"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/67\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":112,"href":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/67\/revisions\/112"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/12"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/parentequip.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=67"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}